I'm Saying Yes!

Dear God,
At the risk of sounding effusive, I just want to thank you so very, very much for everything you have brought into my life: the good, the bad, even the ugly. I really do feel as if everything that's happened to me -- my upbringing, which trained me to take care of myself; the loneliness that broke my heart far too many times to count; the anxiety and bitterness over feeling so different from other women my age; my relationships and heartbreaks -- has brought me where I am today. I am happy. I am hopeful. And I am in love in a way I never, ever thought was even possible.

Without all of them, there's no way I'd be ready for the beautiful, wonderful man you brought to me. I have a certainty about this I have never, ever felt before. There is no insecurity. No uncertainty. No fear he'll run away. And most importantly, no fear that I'm settling for less than I want, even though I wasn't able to articulate what I wanted.

I think that's where you have blessed me the most. You know me so well that you know what I want and need more than I ever could. And you brought it to me. He is the one, God. He's the one who will love me, protect me, defend me, inspire me, and take care of me for the rest of our lives. I just know it.

There's no way I would if you hadn't put me through what you have. You used all those people to show me both what I needed and what I must turn away from.

So I am saying yes. Yes to the future I see every time I look at this man. Yes to his warmth, love, goodness, and true, sincere love for me. It sometimes gets so overwhelming I can hardly breathe.

I have always wanted to say yes. And if or when he asks me to be his forever, I will shout it. And I will run down the aisle... like I have always dreamed I would.